Madness

So tha rapture apparently was supposed to happen today. I wouldn’t know this if I didn’t have a twitter (@rainbro) but enough people told me that it was supposed to as much as people tried to make it sound like raptor sounds like rapture…It’s pretty much an embarrassment to everyone. It embarrasses people who believe in God because it justifies atheists thinking you’re an idiot that tha end of tha world would have some sort of time table on it; It’s embarrassing to atheists because they act like tha people that believe this shit are real. They’re about as real as it being summer in May.





I’m so sick of clowns "loving summer." News flash posers: it's MAY okay? Blue creme Oreos haven't even come out yet. Get a clue. I haven’t been able to find those R!O Oreos either. Sad day. But I DID get to see R!O and it was sooo good. Top 5 of tha 2000’s for sure. Bolt of course being number one. Educate yourself. I still haven’t seen Scream 4, Fast 5, or Thor…um…1. But I did also see Bridesmaids! I was skeptical to check it out since people kept comparing it to tha Hangover but it’s really nothing like tha Hangover at all. Ya see Bridesmaids…

is a comedy.




A comedy that doesn't bring me half as much LOLz as faggots who own iPADs and now think they're dubstep DJs. Yooo I own bandaids. Am I a doctor?! None of you are photographers, models, DJs, musicians, comedians, writers, artists, or even "porn stars." You have a Facebook page, a camera, and a dream. And hey, keep livin' it! 'Cause you think life sucks now? Oh man! Wait til you have your heart broken and a rent bill. And recently my heart was broken.






It broke as soon as I was told that one of tha most recognizable names in wrestling, "Macho Man" Randy Savage died at age 58 due to a car accident. He was a big part of my childhood and I truly am saddened by tha news of his death. His style and charisma was only outshined by his performance in tha ring. He'll always be immortal to me.

R.I.P. Randy Poffo

Nuer Than Most

Yooo...look at that! Only like a month delay this time. So Wrestlemania was amazing. I met Michelle McCool and she hugged me and I'm pretty sure we're best friends now. Check my twitter followers ya know?! I got to see tha Hawks kill tha Celtics (but not really kill them. That faggot Davis is still breathing unfortunately :[ ) and eat at my favorite restaurants in Atlanta eating tha best fake food money and blood diamonds can buy.




Tha NBA playoffs are goin' down right now and if you know me you know I back tha Lakers hard. Perhaps tha hardest. Recently Kobe got a lot of heat on him for calling a ref a "fucking faggot" and I think that's really fucked up...that he's getting shit for it. Review tha video - that ref was being a fucking faggot! I have a lesbian hairscut and marched in pride parades when you were still thinking SOAP Shoes were cool so if anyone is qualified to identify tha proper use of tha word faggot it's me.




I've been trying to go out of my way to spread tha gospel of tha nu in 2011 and have been able to see some of my favorite bands from when I was younger: Taproot, Cold, (hed) P.E., Papa Roach and MY band even got to play with Nonpoint on my birthday a couple weeks ago. I really want girls to embrace this nu-ness in their style and this begins with anemically pale skin and most importantly... artificially colored hair. My go to color? PURPLE. And holy fuck if you can combine this with tha side ponytail?! I'll melt like ice cream you forgot you bought whilst grocery shopping so you go see a movie and then you go to take in tha bread and Capri-Sun in and you're like fuuuuuuck tha ice cream!!!!!





Purple isn't tha only color though. I pretty much back any unnatural hair color: teal, blue, red. Feel free to play bass and wear studs and combat boots too. We can make this work.





Basically what I'm trying to say is: I'm 12 years old, it's not rape if it's family, I don't know what an Osama Bin Laden is, and I spend my days trying to drown myself in tha bottom of these cans.




So unless my dream finally comes true and my phone isn't always tha lucky one who gets to die, I'll talk to you soon.

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